The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin Quotes

C.J.: The computer has processed the results of the smelling.
Reginald Perrin: Ah!
C.J.: Exactly. As you so rightly say Ah! This is what smell number one reminded its smellers of: five people - mountains, four people - snow, three people - fresh water, two people - large forest, one person - Bolivian unicyclist's jockstrap!
Reginald Perrin: This is extraordinary, C.J.!
C.J.: Smell number two: nine people - herbs, one each for: lavender, thyme, marjoram, spice factory, heather and Bolivian unicyclist's jockstrap!
Reginald Perrin: This is astonishing, C.J.!
C.J.: Smell number three, and a greater degree of unanimity: fourteen people - roses. But!
Reginald Perrin: But!
C.J.: One person - Bolivian unicyclist's jockstrap!
Reginald Perrin: I can hardly credit this, C.J.
C.J.: It's the same sorry story for all ten smells.
Reginald Perrin: Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear.
C.J.: I didn't get where I am today by everything smelling of Bolivian unicyclist's jockstraps!

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
C.J.: I didn't get where I am today by sleeping with sweaty, Caledonian chefs!

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
Doc Morrissey: Has that secretary of yours got any more chest trouble?
Reginald Perrin: No.
Doc Morrissey: Oh, pity.

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
Reginald Perrin: [On the phone] Uh-hmmm. Oh, dear. Oh, dear, oh, dear. Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh dear. Yes, right, certainly, officer, right. OK, goodbye. [Hangs up]
Elizabeth Perrin: Reggie, what's the matter?
Reginald Perrin: Oh, McBlane broke an arm last night. I have to go and bail him out.
Elizabeth Perrin: Bail? I didn't know breaking an arm was an offense.
Reginald Perrin: Oh, yes, if it's someone else's arm, darling.

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
[Reggie explains his tardiness]
Reginald Perrin: Twenty-two minutes late, badger ate a junction box at New Malden.

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
[Reggie is awaiting his first customer at his new shop, Grot]
Customer In Shop: Everything in this shop is rubbish, is it?
Reginald Perrin: Absolutely, sir.
Customer In Shop: I see. What's the point of that, then?
Reginald Perrin: Well, we're sold so much rubbish these days under false pretenses, I decided to be honest about it.
Customer In Shop: Ah, you've got a point there. There you have got a point.

Movie: The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin