The Boat Quotes

Minister Dormandy: You see, that's the whole point of being the government. If you don't like something you simply make up a new law that makes it illegal.

Movie: The Boat
Quentin: [to Angus] I can see your nuts, Nutsford.

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Quentin: The day has come. Tonight pirate radio dies. From midnight, we are a ghost ship floating without hope on cold and dark waters. You have done almighty work here. Thank you. But your work is done.

The Count: Not mine, sir. I'm an American citizen and I don't give a hootenanny God damn about your nitpicking limey laws. I intend to broadcast from this ship 24 hours a day until the day I die. And then for a couple days after that.

Gavin Cavanagh: Not wanting to sound rude or anything, but don't you think that might be an ever so slightly monotonous experience for the listener? What do you say to 12 hours each, noble sir?

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Quentin: Your mother is dropping by to pay us a visit before Christmas.

'Young' Carl: You're kidding? When does she arrive?

Quentin: Tomorrow. She was always very impromptu. Anyway, I thought you might like to know, in case you want to brush your hair or hide the large stack of pornography you keep on that shelf.

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Simon: [to his bride, Elenore] Wow. You look like a unicorn... in a negligee.

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Simon: I think we're actually going to die.

Thick Kevin: Why?

Simon: I'll explain later.

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SOS Receiver: Who is it?

The Boat Builder: Damfino.

SOS Receiver: Neither do I!

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The Count: Cuz if you shoot a bullet, someone dies. When you drop a bomb, many die. You hit a woman, love dies. But... if you say the f-word, nothing actually happens.

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Thick Kevin: It's type of bird, but it's wearing a hat. Not so much a hat. Something that's at the top of a coat and attached to the coat and covers the head, but is not a hat.

'Young' Carl: A hood?

Thick Kevin: Yes, and now the first name, type of bird. It's a something hood.

'Young' Carl: Robin Hood! Why didn't you just say he lived in Sherwood Forest and has a bow and an arrow?

Thick Kevin: Yeah? What? Who are you talking about?

'Young' Carl: Robin Hood.

Thick Kevin: I didn't know that.

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Zack Malloy: You wouldn't hit a coward, would you?

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[repeated line]

Minister Dormandy: Arse!

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Angus: She likes the bearded man...

Dave: With a tiny knob...

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Austin: Yes, I kill. I'm aware of he situation and I'm sorry. But in cases like this it's easy for me to act with cold-blooded detachment because I just can't stand people that peep where they shouldn't be peeking. So shut up and let me us your blood!

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Axel Nordstrom: Look out Jenny! Look out!

Jennifer Nelson: Hey! Out of the way!

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Bruce Templeton: Are you or are you not the girl in the glass bottom boat?

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Bruce Templeton: Hey! You're the mermaid

Jennifer Nelson: Yes, I'm the mermaid

Bruce Templeton: Didn't recognize you with your clothes on.

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Bruce Templeton: This vault of 10-inch steel plate will open only to the frequency of my own voice repeating this equation: G for gamma, B for beta, A for alpha, Omega for open sesame.

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Dave: Walk this way.

Simon: Don't walk that way!

'Young' Carl: I'm just gonna...

Simon: Walk woodpecker way.

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Edgar Hill: I want to talk to you a minute. Those phone calls, there is no question about it. She's an agent, operating for the...

Bruce Templeton: She's no more an agent than you are! And if you're the best the CIA can come up with, this country is in big trouble!

Edgar Hill: Now look here! We'll have to detain her.

Bruce Templeton: Mrs Nelson can leave here whenever she wishes!

Edgar Hill: What's that noise?

Bruce Templeton: What? Oh, well I locked her in the closet.

Movie: The Boat
Edgar Hill: I want to talk to you a minute. Those phone calls, there is no question about it. She's an agent, operating for the...

Bruce Templeton: She's no more an agent than you are! And if you're the best the CIA can come up with, this country is in big trouble!

Edgar Hill: Now look here! We'll have to detain her.

Bruce Templeton: Mrs Nelson can leave here whenever she wishes!

Edgar Hill: What's that noise?

Bruce Templeton: What? Oh, well I locked her in the closet.

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Gavin Cavanagh: Are you doing something dirty? Are you doing something your parents don't know about? Are you breaking the law? Are you breaking the rules?

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Gavin Cavanagh: Now it's just you and me, and I'm looking right up your skirt.

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His Wife: Where are we?

The Boat Builder: Damfino.

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Homer Cripps: She's a pretty strange acting female.

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Jennifer Nelson: [sings] The Glass Bottom Boat you will agree, will show you the magic of the deep blue sea.

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Jennifer Nelson: Aaah! Aaah! Who are you? Who is he?

Bruce Templeton: Zack Malloy, my partner. He drops in every now and then to molest women.

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Jennifer Nelson: Hey! What in heavens name do you think you're doing?

Bruce Templeton: You talkin' to me?

Jennifer Nelson: Yes I'm talking to you! That's my suit on your line!

Bruce Templeton: Oh I'm sorry... that's a funny looking suit.

Jennifer Nelson: It's my mermaid tail. and would you please throw it back?

Bruce Templeton: Well it's kind of difficult. it's all tangled. Why don't you come aboard, and I'll untangle it for you

Jennifer Nelson: Well THAT's a little difficult too, since I'm BOTTOMLESS!

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Jennifer Nelson: That sign over there, that says "No Fishing".

Bruce Templeton: I wasn't exactly fishing.

Jennifer Nelson: Then what were you doing?

Bruce Templeton: Maybe I was hunting for mermaids.

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Jennifer Nelson: The recognition signal is: Vladimir Sent Me. Over!

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Jennifer Nelson: This is called The Clean Room. It's completely sterilized so that no dust or dirt will contaminate the critical parts. Workers entering the clean room must first stand on this grate, which shakes off dust from shoes and clothing. Like this... Oh dear, I guess we better go now. We'll go that way.
[her shoe is stuck in the grate]

Movie: The Boat