Stargate - Atlantis Quotes



Lt. Ford: [Smiling] So, we got ourselves a life-signs detector.
Maj. Sheppard: [looks aggravated] We can name it later.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Col. Sumner: Go to hell.
Queen Wraith: Earth first!

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[Sheppard shoots Wraith in the hand, but they capture him]
Maj. Sheppard: How's the hand?
Wraith: [Hand heals] Much better.
Maj. Sheppard: Sorry to hear that.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[After they have arrived home on Atlantis]
Maj. Sheppard: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Atlantis. Please remain seated until the Puddle-Jumper has come to a full and complete stop.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[about John and Teyla's exchange]
Dr. Beckett: [wistfully] How come I never make friends like that?
Dr. McKay: You really need to get out more.
Dr. Beckett: We're in another galaxy. How much more out can you get?

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
Dr. McKay: [suddenly looking suspiciously at his kebab] Is there lemon in this?! [He hurries off to find out]

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[After Weir reminds Sheppard of his status as Atlantis' military leader]
John Sheppard: You do realize that could get us into all sorts of trouble, right?

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
[Beckett is explaining that his innoculation uses a mouse retrovirus]
Dr. McKay: Well, are there any side-effects?
Dr. Beckett: Dry mouth, headache, the irresistible urge to run on a small wheel...

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[Weir interrupts McKay and Sheppard "testing" an Ancient shield]
Dr. Weir: I'm still trying to understand how you thought it was a good idea to test this device by having someone throw you off a balcony.
Dr. McKay: Oh, believe me, that's not the first thing we tried.
Maj. Sheppard: [proudly] I shot him. [Dr. Weir gives him a stern look] In the leg!
Dr. McKay: I'm invulnerable!
Dr. Weir: Aren't you the one who's always spouting off about how proper and careful scientific procedure must be adhered to?
Dr. McKay: [sing-song] IN - VUL - NER - ABLE!
Dr. Weir: Ok, take it off
Dr. McKay: Oh, you're just jealous.
Dr. Weir: Oh yes. Green with envy.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. Weir: I wouldn't have thought you believed in ghosts.
Dr. McKay: I never used to, then I learned about things called Wraiths that can suck the life out of you with their hands. [raises hand, gestures demonstratively] What the hell is that?

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. Beckett: He fainted.
Dr. McKay: Oh, there's got to be a better word.
Dr. Beckett: "Faint" is the proper medical term.
Dr. McKay: [defensively] I passed out from... manly hunger.
Maj. Sheppard: Well, hang in there. [over radio] Dr. Weir, this is Sheppard. McKay's okay. [smirks] He, uh, he fainted.
[Beckett grins]
Dr. McKay: Oh yeah, that's very sympathetic. Let's all mock the dying man!

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[about the transporter]
Maj. Sheppard: Apparently it's also an elevator.
Dr. McKay: Really?
Dr. Weir: We can stop taking the stairs everywhere.
Dr. McKay: [sarcastically] Oh, how nice for you all.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[about the entity]
Maj. Sheppard: It's coming. I think we're gonna need a bigger boat.
Dr. McKay: Size doesn't matter.
Maj. Sheppard: That's a myth.
Dr. McKay: It'll fit. It traps the entity in subspace. You just just have to make sure it gets all the way in the containment vessel before you shut it off.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
Lt. Ford: Why'd you close the door?
Dr. McKay: So that when the Stargate shuts down and the forward section is severed, we're not directly exposed to space.
Lt. Ford: Will it hold?
Dr. McKay: Like a screen door on a submarine. I just prefer hypoxia to explosive decompression. It's a personal thing.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


[about the Jumper]
Dr. Weir: Is there anything I can do to help?
Dr. Zelenka: Stop talking, please.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: Oh, I apologize for being the only person who truly comprehends how screwed we are!
Maj. Sheppard: Don't talk to me about screwed! And let's not give up on Markham and Stackhouse either. There's plenty of time to solve this thing, but you've got to stop using your mouth and start using your brain!
Dr. McKay: I'm sorry. It's just, um, I react to certain doom a certain way.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. Kavanagh: I happily left the SGC. because I had had it up to here with the military running things; and you just busted me like a private.
Dr. Weir: Don't be so dramatic. Besides, the Air Force doesn't have privates.
Dr. Kavanagh: Neither do I. You just cut them off. Right in front of my research team.
Dr. Weir: That's what this is about? You're embarrassed?
Dr. Kavanagh: Well, humiliated would be a little more accurate.
Dr. Weir: I haven't worked up to humiliation yet.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
[Rodney has one foot on the conference room table and is massaging it through his sock]
Maj. Sheppard: [Looking on in distaste] Could you please not do that here?
Dr. McKay: My foot is still numb, if you'll excuse me.
Maj. Sheppard: Well at least your mouth still works fine.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: How could I possibly know that? What am I, Answer Man?

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: There's a command subroutine I've never seen before.
Dr. Zelenka: What is its function?
Dr. McKay: [exasperated] I don't know, because I've never seen it before!

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


"Steve" the Wraith: When I am free, you will be the first that I feed upon.
Maj. Sheppard: [casually] Okie dokie. I'm gonna go make myself a sandwich.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
[the sensors have discovered a powerful energy field]
Maj. Sheppard: You think it's worth checking out?
Dr. McKay: Any significant energy emission generally indicates technological civilization.
Maj. Sheppard: So... you think it's worth checking out?
Dr. McKay: [sarcastically] I'm sorry. Yes. Energy field good.
[the ship begins to shake violently]
Dr. McKay: [seriously] Okay, maybe not.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: What are we going to tell them, Teyla? "Listen, kiddies, everything you believe is wrong, and trust us because we've been here for-" [checks watch] "-almost an hour!"

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: Let's play a quiet game. Let's see who can be quiet the longest.
Casta: I'm not a quiet person.
Dr. McKay: That's not quiet. That's talking.
Casta: Well, I'm not a quiet person. I talk a lot.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Casta: You're mean!
Dr. McKay: Thank you for finally noticing. [gets mad and starts to shake Casta] Oh, you wanna go? You wanna go do you?!
Ford: Okay [picks up Casta] You have a real gift with the kids. You do birthday parties?

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. Weir: Rodney! We can't just visit planets, take away their defenses, uproot their cultures and bring ‘em all back here to Atlantis!
Dr. McKay: If they have a ZPM, yes we can.
Dr. Weir: Oh my God! How morally superior you must feel!

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Lt. Col. Sheppard: How much time do you need to rework the DHD?
Dr. McKay: Well, in a perfect world, two days.
Lt. Col. Sheppard: Rodney?
Dr. McKay: Right now, uh, ten minutes, give or take.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis
Dr. McKay: No, no, no, no, he just doesn't like going through the Stargate.
Maj. Sheppard: He's worse than Dr. McCoy.
Teyla: Who?
Maj. Sheppard: The TV character that Dr. Beckett plays in real life.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. McKay: C'mon, how often do you get to travel to an alien planet?
Dr. Beckett: I was already on an alien planet!

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis


Dr. Weir: You do understand the Geneva Convention prohibits using prisoners for scientific experiments?
Maj. Sheppard: No offense, doc, but had the Wraith attended the Geneva Convention, they would have tried to feed on everyone there.

TV Show: Stargate Atlantis