MASH Quotes
Capt. Peterson: [hostile tone of voice] What are you two HOODLUMS doing in this hospital?
Hawkeye Pierce: Ma'am, we are surgeons and we are here to operate. We just waiting for a starting time. That's all.
Capt. Peterson: You can't even go near a patient until Col. Merrill says its ok and he's still out to lunch.
Trapper John: Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. [turns to Hakweye]
Trapper John: Ham and eggs will all right. [turns back to Capt. Peterson]
Trapper John: Steak would be even better. And then give me at least ONE nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.
Capt. Peterson: [outraged] Oh! [turns to leave and bumps into Nurse in Japan]
Capt. Peterson: Oh! Fool! [stomps out of ward]
Nurse in Japan: How do you want your steak cooked?
Hawkeye Pierce: Ma'am, we are surgeons and we are here to operate. We just waiting for a starting time. That's all.
Capt. Peterson: You can't even go near a patient until Col. Merrill says its ok and he's still out to lunch.
Trapper John: Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. [turns to Hakweye]
Trapper John: Ham and eggs will all right. [turns back to Capt. Peterson]
Trapper John: Steak would be even better. And then give me at least ONE nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.
Capt. Peterson: [outraged] Oh! [turns to leave and bumps into Nurse in Japan]
Capt. Peterson: Oh! Fool! [stomps out of ward]
Nurse in Japan: How do you want your steak cooked?
Movie: MASH
Colonel Blake: [General Hammond is yelling in their direction] Radar!
Radar: Sir?
Colonel Blake: What's the general trying to say?
Radar: He's just been informed as to the identity of our, uh, Spearchucker. Their ringer spotted our ringer.
Colonel Blake: How do ya like them apples, Charlie?
Radar: Sir?
Colonel Blake: What's the general trying to say?
Radar: He's just been informed as to the identity of our, uh, Spearchucker. Their ringer spotted our ringer.
Colonel Blake: How do ya like them apples, Charlie?
Movie: MASH
P.A. Announcer: Attention. Attention. May I have the camps' attention? This week's movie will be When Willie Comes Marching Home. Uh... The biggest parade of laughs of World War II. All the love, laughs and escapades of the Willies who came marching home. This film stars Dan Dailey, Corinne Calvet, and Colleen Townsend.
Movie: MASH
SSgt. Gorman: [Hawkeye and Trapper begin speaking in mock Japanese] Goddamn army. [Tries to start his Jeep]
SSgt. Gorman: Goddamn army jeep.
SSgt. Gorman: Goddamn army jeep.
Movie: MASH