It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Quote
Charlie: You wanna talk about stress? You wanna talk about stress?! OK! I've stumbled onto a major company conspiracy, Mac--how 'bout that for stress?
Mac: What the hell are you talking about?
Charlie: This company is being bled like a stuck pig, Mac, and I've got a paper trail to prove it. Check this out. [Goes to a wall covered in paper and string] Take a look at this.
Mac: Jesus Christ, Charlie!
Charlie: That right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Mac? I've been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, OK? "Pepe Silvia," this name keeps coming up over and over again. Every day Pepe's mail is getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia! Pepe Silvia! I look in the mail, and this whole box is Pepe Silvia! So I say to myself, "I gotta find this guy! I gotta go up to his office and put his mail in the guy's goddamn hands! Otherwise, he's never going to get it and he's going to keep coming back down here." So I go up to Pepe's office and what do I find out, Mac? What do I find out?! There is no Pepe Silvia. The man does not exist, okay? So I decide, "Oh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper." There's no Pepe Silvia? You gotta be kidding me! I got boxes full of Pepe! All right. So I start marchin' my way down to Carol in HR and I knock on her door and I say, "Carol! Carol! I gotta talk to you about Pepe." And when I open the door what do I find? There's not a single goddamn desk in that office! There...is...no...Carol in HR. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.
Mac: OK, Charlie I'm going to have to stop you right there. Not only do all of these people exist, but they've been asking for their mail on a daily basis. It's all they're talking about up there. Jesus Christ, dude, we are going to lose our jobs.
Charlie: Well, calm down because here's one thing
Mac: What the hell are you talking about?
Charlie: This company is being bled like a stuck pig, Mac, and I've got a paper trail to prove it. Check this out. [Goes to a wall covered in paper and string] Take a look at this.
Mac: Jesus Christ, Charlie!
Charlie: That right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Mac? I've been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, OK? "Pepe Silvia," this name keeps coming up over and over again. Every day Pepe's mail is getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia! Pepe Silvia! I look in the mail, and this whole box is Pepe Silvia! So I say to myself, "I gotta find this guy! I gotta go up to his office and put his mail in the guy's goddamn hands! Otherwise, he's never going to get it and he's going to keep coming back down here." So I go up to Pepe's office and what do I find out, Mac? What do I find out?! There is no Pepe Silvia. The man does not exist, okay? So I decide, "Oh shit, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper." There's no Pepe Silvia? You gotta be kidding me! I got boxes full of Pepe! All right. So I start marchin' my way down to Carol in HR and I knock on her door and I say, "Carol! Carol! I gotta talk to you about Pepe." And when I open the door what do I find? There's not a single goddamn desk in that office! There...is...no...Carol in HR. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.
Mac: OK, Charlie I'm going to have to stop you right there. Not only do all of these people exist, but they've been asking for their mail on a daily basis. It's all they're talking about up there. Jesus Christ, dude, we are going to lose our jobs.
Charlie: Well, calm down because here's one thing
TV Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
