It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Quote
(Cut to the restaurant.)
Dennis: Guess what? I just topped myself for most phone numbers in one day--nine.
Dee(high-fiving him): Nine? Come on. Six strawberry margaritas, please. (Charlie and the Waitress come up. Charlie is clearly gloating about something.)
Charlie: Uh, don't make 'em, 'cause you won't have your jobs much longer. Corporate's on their way down here right now to fire your asses!
Dee: What?! You told on us?
Dennis(hurt): Babe, don't do that to me! I feel like we were getting so close, sweet baby--
Charlie: He doesn't even know your name!
Dennis: Yes, I do!
Waitress: What's my name, what is it? (There is a pause while Dennis tries to figure out a way to bullshit his way out of this one.)
Dennis: Beautiful. (It didn't work.)
Waitress(disgusted): Oh, my God! You're a dick!
Dennis: That's what I call you all the time. Would you not want to be called "beautiful"? (Corporate Guy enters.)
Corporate Guy: Are one of you guys the one that called me? (Charlie turns to face him.)
Charlie(raising his hand): Uh, right here. These two (points to Dennis and Dee) are the ones who were stealing.
Corporate Guy: Hey, I know you...(points at Dennis)...and you. You're the ones who run that dive bar down the street!
Charlie: Yeah, and you're the corporate dude with the helicopter.
Corporate Guy: Right. Here's the thing--I had a really strange night last night. Your friends and their doo-wop group, they showed up at my house and tried to attack me. One of them died on my doorstep, and it sorta put me in a funk. So I'm gonna clean house, and you're all fired. (The Gang is taken aback, but the Waitress is incredibly sm
Dennis: Guess what? I just topped myself for most phone numbers in one day--nine.
Dee(high-fiving him): Nine? Come on. Six strawberry margaritas, please. (Charlie and the Waitress come up. Charlie is clearly gloating about something.)
Charlie: Uh, don't make 'em, 'cause you won't have your jobs much longer. Corporate's on their way down here right now to fire your asses!
Dee: What?! You told on us?
Dennis(hurt): Babe, don't do that to me! I feel like we were getting so close, sweet baby--
Charlie: He doesn't even know your name!
Dennis: Yes, I do!
Waitress: What's my name, what is it? (There is a pause while Dennis tries to figure out a way to bullshit his way out of this one.)
Dennis: Beautiful. (It didn't work.)
Waitress(disgusted): Oh, my God! You're a dick!
Dennis: That's what I call you all the time. Would you not want to be called "beautiful"? (Corporate Guy enters.)
Corporate Guy: Are one of you guys the one that called me? (Charlie turns to face him.)
Charlie(raising his hand): Uh, right here. These two (points to Dennis and Dee) are the ones who were stealing.
Corporate Guy: Hey, I know you...(points at Dennis)...and you. You're the ones who run that dive bar down the street!
Charlie: Yeah, and you're the corporate dude with the helicopter.
Corporate Guy: Right. Here's the thing--I had a really strange night last night. Your friends and their doo-wop group, they showed up at my house and tried to attack me. One of them died on my doorstep, and it sorta put me in a funk. So I'm gonna clean house, and you're all fired. (The Gang is taken aback, but the Waitress is incredibly sm
TV Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
