Histeria! Quote

Bill Straitman: Hello, and greetings from the Viking Museum of Weaponry. We're here today with Hakon the Good, king of Norway during the tenth century, and one of the great Viking leaders and warriors.
Hakon the Good: Glad to be here, Bill!
Bill Straitman: Hakon's brought along some weapons to share with us.
Hakon the Good: That's right!
Bill Straitman: Now I understand that great Viking warriors such as yourself like to name their swords.
Hakon the Good: True, Bill!
Bill Straitman: Brave names like Excalibur and so on.
Hakon the Good: Yes!
Bill Straitman: Fierce names; brutal, bloody names.
Hakon the Good: That is correct!
Bill Straitman: Well, tell us, what is this one called?
Hakon the Good: Oh, this one here? This is Bob! Bob the Sword! [pronounces "sword" with a loud "w" sound]
Bill Straitman: Bob?
Hakon the Good: Right! And that's Timmy over there! And right here is Greta! Greta likes Timmy, don't you, Greta? [as Greta] "That's right! I want to marry Timmy!" [as himself] But not if Bob has anything to say about it! Right, Bob? [as Bob] "That's right! You can't marry Timmy; I want to marry you!" [as Greta] "But I love Timmy!" [as Bob] "Too bad! You're marryin' me!" [as Timmy] "Over my dead body!" says Timmy! [as Bob] "Oh yeah?!" [as Timmy] "Yeah!" [as Bob] "Well then, let's go at it!" [begins fighting with himself using the swords, falling over backwards] "Hey, get offa me!" [as Timmy] "Oh, you're askin' for it!" [grabs a nearby axe and speaks with a new voice] "Stand aside, Greta; I'll take care of these two!"
Bill Straitman: Apparently, Hakon's helmet is a touch too tight. Thank you and so long from the Viking Museum of Weaponry. AAAAHH!
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TV Show: Histeria!

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