George Burns Quotes

George Burns Quotes. Below is a collection of famous George Burns quotes. Here you can find the most popular and greatest quotes by George Burns. Share these quotations with your friends and family.

Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!

By George Burns

Life's but a day at most.

By George Burns

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

By George Burns

Be quick to learn and wise to know.

By George Burns

Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.

By George Burns

If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.

By George Burns

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

By George Burns

I look better, feel better, make love better and I'll tell you something else....I never lied better.

By George Burns

When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights

By George Burns

Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair.

By George Burns

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair

By George Burns

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.

By George Burns

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning anf a good ending; and have the two as close together as possible.

By George Burns

The secret of acting is sincerity. If you can fake that, you've got it made

By George Burns

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.

By George Burns

Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope

By George Burns

Nice to be here At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

By George Burns

If you live to the age of a hundred you have it made because very few people die past the age of a hundred

By George Burns

I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the last one left.

By George Burns

I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I hate.

By George Burns

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

By George Burns

I would rather be a failure doing something I love than be a sucess doing something I hate

By George Burns

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

By George Burns

I get a standing ovation jaust standing.

By George Burns

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city

By George Burns

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

By George Burns

Everyday happiness means getting up in the morning, and you can't wait to finish your breakfast. You can't wait to do your exercises. You can't wait to put on your clothes. You can't wait to get out -- and you can't wait to come home, because the soup is hot.

By George Burns

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

By George Burns

Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.

By George Burns

A good sermon should have a good beginning and a good ending, and they should be as close together as possible.

By George Burns