Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Ambrose Bierce Quotes. Below is a collection of famous Ambrose Bierce quotes. Here you can find the most popular and greatest quotes by Ambrose Bierce. Share these quotations with your friends and family.

Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.

By Ambrose Bierce
Bride. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

By Ambrose Bierce
Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. Marriage

By Ambrose Bierce
Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

By Ambrose Bierce
Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage. Marriage

By Ambrose Bierce
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. Marriage

By Ambrose Bierce
Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.

By Ambrose Bierce
A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

By Ambrose Bierce
Learning. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.

By Ambrose Bierce
Quoting: the act of repeating erroneously the words of another.

By Ambrose Bierce
History: An account mostly false, of events, unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.

By Ambrose Bierce
Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.

By Ambrose Bierce
Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table.

By Ambrose Bierce
Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. Intelligence

By Ambrose Bierce
Alien. An American sovereign in his probationary state.

By Ambrose Bierce
History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools. History

By Ambrose Bierce
Habit is a shackle for the free.

By Ambrose Bierce
A funeral is a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker.

By Ambrose Bierce
Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.

By Ambrose Bierce
Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

By Ambrose Bierce
Enthusiasm. A distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.

By Ambrose Bierce
An egotist is a person interested in himself than in me!

By Ambrose Bierce
Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.

By Ambrose Bierce
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious. Education

By Ambrose Bierce
Education is that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.

By Ambrose Bierce
Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding. Education

By Ambrose Bierce
Opiate. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.

By Ambrose Bierce
Duty. That which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.

By Ambrose Bierce
Divorce. A resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

By Ambrose Bierce
Physician -- One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.

By Ambrose Bierce