Freaks and Geeks Quotes
Bill Haverchuck: Fredericks, you're a turd... a stinky f-fat turd, go sniff a jock strap, you poop head. You love patting boys' butts... butt... you butt-patter! You're a perv and a loser and a stinky t-turd!
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Bill Haverchuck: He thinks being the Dungeon Master gives him the license to mess with our heads.
Harris Trinsky: Oh, I'm Sorry. Perhaps I should let you encounter kittens and grandmas so as not to upset you.
Harris Trinsky: Oh, I'm Sorry. Perhaps I should let you encounter kittens and grandmas so as not to upset you.
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Harold Weir: [holding up his thumb] You think I don't know what this means? I know, Lindsay! It means, Hey, stranger! Please lock me in your car, drive me to God knows where and *murder me*!
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Kim Kelly: Are you calling me irrational? Because I'll tear your head off, Daniel. I'll tear it off and throw it over that fence.
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Kim Kelly: He made out with Wendy Franklin at the Laser Dome. And now he wants to go there with me?
Lindsay Weir: So... are you going?
Kim Kelly: Well, yeah. What else am I gonna do?
Lindsay Weir: So... are you going?
Kim Kelly: Well, yeah. What else am I gonna do?
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Sam Weir: It's Cindy. She's kind of boring. It's weird hanging out with her friends. And, I mean, all she wants to do is make out and stuff.
Neal Schweiber: I'd kill to be that bored.
Neal Schweiber: I'd kill to be that bored.
Movie: Freaks and Geeks
Daniel: You guys know Lindsay?
Nick: Yeah, you were in my English class last year. You were the chick that got an A, right?
Lindsay: Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?
Ken: I don't know. What are you gonna do?
Nick: Yeah, you were in my English class last year. You were the chick that got an A, right?
Lindsay: Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?
Ken: I don't know. What are you gonna do?
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Neal: [to Sam] The dance is tomorrow. She's a cheerleader. You've seen "Star Wars" 27 times. You do the math.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Nick: Check it out man, that's uh 14 mounted toms, 8 floor toms, 4 splashes, 2 gongs, 10 cowbells , 4 rides, 5 snares, a rototom rack, and it's all mounted on my infamous quadruple kick drum system. Six more pieces and I got a bigger set than Neil Peart from Rush, yeah.
Lindsay: That's great Nick.
Nick: Teachers want us to work, and I say, "Fine, I'll work. But you've gotta let me do the kind of work that I wanna do. And for me, it's my drum kit, man. This is my passion. This is the essence of who I am now. But before I had this, I was lost, too. You see what I'm saying? You need to find your reason for living. You've gotta find your big, gigantic drum kit.
Lindsay: That's great Nick.
Nick: Teachers want us to work, and I say, "Fine, I'll work. But you've gotta let me do the kind of work that I wanna do. And for me, it's my drum kit, man. This is my passion. This is the essence of who I am now. But before I had this, I was lost, too. You see what I'm saying? You need to find your reason for living. You've gotta find your big, gigantic drum kit.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Harold: I used to have a friend who smoked, you know what happened to him? He died!
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Lindsay: My dad's kinda makin' me go.
Nick: Your dad's makin' you go to the dance? What's that all about?
Ken: Who's your dad? Hitler?
Nick: Your dad's makin' you go to the dance? What's that all about?
Ken: Who's your dad? Hitler?
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Lindsay: All my new friends think I'm some goody-two-shoes and all my old friends think I'm throwing my life away. What the hell am I supposed to do?
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Lindsay: Well, my house is so boring looking...so I just wanted to make it look more party-like.
Ken: Well I'll tell you how to make it look more party-like. Point me to the keg.
Nick: Oh yeah.
Lindsay: In the corner.
Ken: Then I am in the corner.
Ken: Well I'll tell you how to make it look more party-like. Point me to the keg.
Nick: Oh yeah.
Lindsay: In the corner.
Ken: Then I am in the corner.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Harold Weir: I guess you'd prefer we listen to that punk rock music I've been reading about. You know those Sex Pistols? They spit on their audience! Yep, that's what I wanna do. Spend my hard earned money to be spit on. Now that's entertainment.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Harold: Elvis didn't expectorate on his fans.
Sam: No. But he died on the toilet.
Harold: Well, that's paradise compared to where the Sex Pistols are gonna end up.
Sam: No. But he died on the toilet.
Harold: Well, that's paradise compared to where the Sex Pistols are gonna end up.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Daniel: I love being told not to drink by a pot-head hippie guidance counselor.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Sam: What's non-alcoholic beer?
Bill: It's beer but without that ingredient that makes you drunk.
Neal: Alcohol?
Bill: Yeah.
Bill: It's beer but without that ingredient that makes you drunk.
Neal: Alcohol?
Bill: Yeah.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Sam: Keg of beer, please.
Liquor Store Clerk: Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
Neal: Oh, we need a keg of non-alcoholic beer.
Liquor Store Clerk: No!
Sam: But we need it.
Liquor Store Clerk: What for?
Neal: We're gonna switch the kegs at his sister's party.
Liquor Store Clerk: Righteous!
Liquor Store Clerk: Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
Neal: Oh, we need a keg of non-alcoholic beer.
Liquor Store Clerk: No!
Sam: But we need it.
Liquor Store Clerk: What for?
Neal: We're gonna switch the kegs at his sister's party.
Liquor Store Clerk: Righteous!
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Neal: [to Lindsay] Friday night. Always a good time for some Sabbath. [pause] 'Cause, you know...Friday...is the Sabbath...for the Jews.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Neal: I'm Jewish. That's no cakewalk either. Last year I was elected school treasurer. I didn't even run!
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
[Bill is passed out on the floor]
Lindsay: Hey, Bill. Get up. That's how the drummer from Led Zeppelin died.
Lindsay: Hey, Bill. Get up. That's how the drummer from Led Zeppelin died.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Bill: I'm sorry, I can't hear you. Hold on, I'm gonna put the phone on my bionic ear. That's--that's better. No, don't talk so loud! Don't forget, I've got bionic hearing.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks
Daniel: Knock it off, blondie. You're gonna blow the speakers.
Kim: Oh, I'm sorry, Grandpa. I'll try not to blow anything of yours from now on.
Kim: Oh, I'm sorry, Grandpa. I'll try not to blow anything of yours from now on.
TV Show: Freaks and Geeks