Jewish Quotes. Below are examples of popular Jewish quotes. These great quotes about Jewish come from famous people and QuoteSoup members. QuoteSoup is a great resource for Jewish quotes. Share these sayings and quotations with friends.

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"Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to."

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"I'm now making a Jewish porno film. 10% Sex, 90% guilt."

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"I asked a Jewish man, 'Do you know where Michigan Avenue is?' He said, 'Yes', and walked away."

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"A little Jewish Grandma is at the Florida coast with her little Jewish Grandson. The grandson is playing on the beach when a big wave comes and washes the kid out to sea. The lifeguards swim out, bring him back to shore, the paramedics work on him for a l"

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"A Jewish woman had 2 chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, 'Can I park here?' 'No' says the cop. 'What about all these other cars?' 'They didn't ask!'"

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, 'Are you comfortable?' The man says, 'I make a good living.'"

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"2 Jewish women in New York. One says, 'Do you see what's going on in Poland?' The other says, 'I live in the back, I don't see anything.'"

jewish quote by Henny Youngman

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"We are taking sure, steady steps to a place where the state of Israel will no longer be a democracy and a home for the Jewish people,"

jewish quote by Ami Ayalon

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"People who are not Jewish and are attracted to Judaism should know that it's tough being Jewish. There are commandments in the Jewish faith that non-Jews simply don't have to observe."

jewish quote by Rabbi Katz

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"One should not stand at the foot of a sick person's bed, because that place is reserved for the guardian angel."

jewish quote by Jewish Folk Saying

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"Never trust the man who tells you all his troubles but keeps from you all his joys."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverbs

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"His own beliefs about Judaism are not consistent with Judaism. He is challenging Jewish lawthat is blatantly insincere."

jewish quote by Gary Friedman

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"At one point, I thought that maybe humor was the best way to deal with it. I figured maybe I should get 12 old Jewish comedians, you know, Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner, to sit around a table and have them riff off 'The Protocols."

jewish quote by Marc Levin

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"I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish church, by the Roman church, by the Greek church, by the Turkish church, by the Protestant church, nor by any church that I know of. My own mind is my own church."

jewish quote by Thomas Paine

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"You can't force anyone to love you or lend you money."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"A mother understands what a child does not say."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"If God lived on earth, people would break his windows."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Look for the good, not the evil, in the conduct of members of the family."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"He who puts up with insult invites injury."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"If you can't go over, you must go under."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"A pessimist, confronted with two bad choices, chooses both."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian, or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit."

jewish quote by Thomas Paine

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"All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit."

jewish quote by Thomas Paine

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"As he thinks in his heart, so he is."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"As long as Nazi violence was unleashed only, or mainly, against the Jews, the rest of the world looked on passively and even treaties and agreements were made with the patently criminal government of the Third Reich.... The doors of Palestine were closed to Jewish immigrants, and no country could be found that would admit those forsaken people. They were left to perish like their brothers and sisters in the occupied countries. We shall never forget the heroic efforts of the small countries, of the Scandinavian, the Dutch, the Swiss nations, and of individuals in the occupied part of Europe who did all in their power to protect Jewish lives."

jewish quote by Albert Einstein

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"Ask about your neighbors, then buy the house."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"As you teach, you learn."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Do not be wise in words - be wise in deeds."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Don't be sweet, lest you be eaten up don't be bitter, lest you be spewed out."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Don't open a shop unless you know how to smile."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Don't look for more honor than your learning merits."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Don't live in a town where there are no doctors."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Even a secret agent can't lie to a Jewish mother."

jewish quote by Peter Malkin

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"First mend yourself, and then mend others."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"First they came for the Communists but I was not a Communist so I did not speak out. Then they came for the Socialists and the Trade Unionists but I was not one of them, so I did not speak out. Then they came for the Jews but I was not Jewish so I did not speak out. And when they came for me, there was no one left to speak out for me."

jewish quote by Martin Niemoeller

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"God could not be everywhere, and therefore he created mothers."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Grant, Lord, that we might overcome our enemies by transforming them into friends. Make them and make us conscious of those deep inward reaches whereby every heart is rooted in our world's deep common life."

jewish quote by Jewish Prayer

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"He that can't endure the bad, will not live to see the good."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Here is a great body of our Jewish citizens from whom have sprung men of genius in every walk of our varied life; men who have conceived of its ideals with singular clearness; and led enterprises with sprit & sagacity... They are not Jews in America, they are American citizens."

jewish quote by Woodrow Wilson

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"If charity cost nothing, the world would be full of philanthropists."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"If not for fear, sin would be sweet."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"If the rich could hire the poor to die for them, the poor would make a very nice living."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"If the rich could hire someone else to die for them, the poor would make a wonderful living."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Just as courage imperils life, fear protects it."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Leading the Jewish people is not easy-we are a divided, obstinate, highly individualistic people who have cultivated faith, sharp-wittedness and polemics to a very high level."

jewish quote by Shimon Peres

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"Life is the biggest bargain. We get it for nothing."

jewish quote by Jewish proverb

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"Make sure to be in with your equals if you're going to fall out with your superiors."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"OK, here's a Christian pastor writing a book that a Jewish lady is passing on to a Muslim lady."

jewish quote by Rick Warren

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"One of the great strengths of the United States is... we have a very large Christian population - we do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values."

jewish quote by Barack Obama

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"Our forces saved the remnants of the Jewish people of Europe for a new life and a new hope in the reborn land of Israel. Along with all men of good will, I salute the young state and wish it well."

jewish quote by Dwight D. Eisenhower

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"People come to poverty in two ways accumulating debts and paying them off."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"People often say that humans have always eaten animals, as if this is a justification for continuing the practice. According to this logic, we should not try to prevent people from murdering other people, since this has also been done since the earliest of times."

jewish quote by Isaac Bashevis Singer

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"Rejoice not at thine enemy's fall - but don't rush to pick him up either."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"The innkeeper loves a drunkard, but not for a son-in-law."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"The Jewish nation is indeed, the heart of the world and there is no reason for the existence of empires, kings, rulers, masses or systems aside from their reaction to the Jewish people."

jewish quote by Meir Kahane

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"The only truly dead are those who have been forgotten."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"The pursuit of knowledge for its own sake, an almost fanatical love of justice, and the desire for personal independence - these are the features of Jewish tradition that make me thank my stars that I belong to it."

jewish quote by Albert Einstein

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"The ritual of marriage is not simply a social event; it is a crossing of threads in the fabric of fate. Many strands bring the couple and their families together and spin their lives into a fabric that is woven on their children."

jewish quote by Portuguese-Jewish Wedding Ceremony

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"Truth is the safest lie."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"With money in your pocket you are wise, you are handsome, and you sing well too."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"Worries go down better with soup than without."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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"You have to be realistic about terrorism. Certain groups of people, certain groups, Muslim fundamentalists, Christian fundamentalists, Jewish fundamentalists, and just plain guys from Montanta, are going to continue to make life in this country very interesting for a long, long time."

jewish quote by George Carlin

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"Your friend has a friend don't tell him."

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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" When horses, drawing a cart, come to a rough road or a steep hill, and it is hard for them to draw the cart without help, it is our duty to help them, even when they belong to a non-Jew, because of the precept not to be cruel to animals, lest the owner smite them to force them to draw more than their strength permits."

jewish quote by The Code of Jewish Law

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"'You never soar so high as when you stoop down to help a child or an animal.'"

jewish quote by Jewish Proverb

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" It is forbidden to tie the legs of a beast or of a bird in a manner as to cause them pain."

jewish quote by The Code of Jewish Law

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"Jews will move increasingly to vegetarianism out of their own deepening knowledge of what their tradition commands...Man's carnivorous nature is not taken for granted or praised in the fundamental teachings of Judaism...A whole galaxy of central rabbinic and spiritual leaders...has been affirming vegetarianism as the ultimate meaning of Jewish moral teaching."

jewish quote by Rabbi Isaac ha-Levi Herzog

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"It is forbidden, according to the law of the Torah, to inflict pain upon any living creature. On the contrary, it is our duty to relieve the pain of any creature, even if it is ownerless or belongs to a non-Jew."

jewish quote by The Code of Jewish Law

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"It appears that the first intention of the Maker was to have men live on a strictly vegetarian diet. The very earliest periods of Jewish history are marked with humanitarian conduct towards the lower animal kingdom...It is clearly established that the ancient Hebrews knew and perhaps were the first among men to know, that animals feel and suffer pain."

jewish quote by Rabbi Simon Glazer

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"There's a Jewish Law to prevent 'tsaar ba-alei chaim' (the suffering of living creatures) and to value their lives as intrinsically worthy. Causing suffering to any living creature constitutes a violation of this Law which states: 'It is forbidden, according to the Law of the Holy Torah, to inflict pain upon any living creatures. On the contrary, it is our duty to relieve the pain of any creatures...''"

jewish quote by Anonymous

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"For a Jewish Puritan of the middle class, the novel is serious, the novel is work, the novel is conscientious application -- why, the novel is practically the retail business all over again."

jewish quote by Howard Nemerov

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"Don't ask questions of fairy tales."

jewish quote by Jewish Folk Saying

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"People ask how can a Jewish kid from the Bronx do preppy clothes? Does it have to do with class and money? It has to do with dreams."

jewish quote by Ralph Lauren

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"I'm half Scottish and half Jewish, so don't ask me for money."

jewish quote by David Duchovny

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"I remember: it happened yesterday, or eternities ago. A young Jewish boy discovered the Kingdom of Night. I remember his bewilderment, I remember his anguish. It all happened so fast. The ghetto. The deportation. The sealed cattle car. The fiery altar upon which the history of our people and the future of mankind were meant to be sacrificed. I remember he asked his father: Can this be true? This is the twentieth century, not the Middle Ages. Who would allow such crimes to be committed? How could the world remain silent? And now the boy is turning to me. Tell me, he asks, what have you done with my future, what have you done with your life? And I tell him that I have tried. That I have tried to keep memory alive, that I have tried to fight those who would forget. Because if we forget, we are guilty, we are accomplices. And then I explain to him how na"

jewish quote by Elie Wiesel

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"I am saying voluntarily that I have sung for almost every religious group in the country, from Jewish and Catholic, and Presbyterian and Holy Rollers and Revival Churches. I love my country very dearly, and I greatly resent the implication that some of the places that I have sung and some of the people that I have known, and some of my opinions, whether they are religious or philosophical, make me less of an American."

jewish quote by Pete Seeger

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"The highest principles for our aspirations and judgments are given to us in the Jewish-Christian religious tradition."

jewish quote by Albert Einstein

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"I believe in one God, and no more; and I hope for happiness beyond this life. I believe in the equality of man; and I believe that religious duties consist in doing justice, loving mercy, and endeavoring to make our fellow-creatures happy. But, lest it should be supposed that I believe in many other things in addition to these, I shall, in the progress of this work, declare the things I do not believe, and my reasons for not believing them. I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish church, by the Roman church, by the Greek church, by the Turkish church, by the Protestant church, nor by any church that I know of. My own mind is my own church. All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit. I do not mean by this declaration to condemn those who believe otherwise; they have the same right to their belief as I have to mine. But it is necessary to the happiness of man, that he be mentally faithful to himself. Infidelity does not consist in believing, or in disbelieving; it consists in professing to believe what he does not believe."

jewish quote by Thomas Paine

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"Men should be careful lest they cause women to weep, for God counts their tears."

jewish quote by The Talmud, a Jewish text

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"I'm comfortable being old... being black... being Jewish."

jewish quote by Billy Crystal

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"Truth is heavy, so few men carry it."

jewish quote by Jewish Folk Saying

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"All the darkness in the world could not put out the light of one small candle."

jewish quote by Found on a jewish Holocaust victims headstone

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"An important Jew who died in exile."

jewish quote by W.H. Auden

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"My mother made me a scientist without ever intending to. Every other Jewish mother in Brooklyn would ask her child after school: So? Did you l..."

jewish quote by Isidor Isaac Rabi

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"Some of my favorite James Brown hits...if he were Jewish. - Living in the West Bank - It's A Hasidic World - Papa's Got A Brand New Bag of Hebrew National Beef Franks - Make My Frontlet Band Funky - Say It Loud-I'm Jewish And I'm Proud - I Got Ants In My Pants (And I Want To Bar Mitzvah)"

jewish quote by Mark Pringle

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