Mark Twain Quotes

Mark Twain Quotes. Below is a collection of famous Mark Twain quotes. Here you can find the most popular and greatest quotes by Mark Twain. Share these quotations with your friends and family.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.

By Mark Twain
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.

By Mark Twain
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

By Mark Twain
Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all.

By Mark Twain
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.

By Mark Twain
To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

By Mark Twain
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.

By Mark Twain
Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody.

By Mark Twain
Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

By Mark Twain
Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our r...

By Mark Twain
We never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead—and not then until we have been dead years and years. Pe...

By Mark Twain
We don't know any more about pictures than a kangaroo does about metaphysics.... To us, the great uncultivated, it is the last thing in the wo...

By Mark Twain
We said there warn't no home like a raft, after all. Other places do seem so cramped up and smothery, but a raft don't. You feel mighty free a...

By Mark Twain
These was all nice pictures, I reckon, but I didn't somehow seem to take to them, because if ever I was down a little, they always give me the...

By Mark Twain
There is nothing here [Civita Vecchia] to see. They have not even a cathedral, with eleven tons of solid silver archbishops in the back room; ...

By Mark Twain
The lightning there is peculiar; it is so convincing! When it strikes a thing, it doesn't leave enough of that thing behind for you to tell wh...

By Mark Twain
The houses are from five to seven feet high, and all built upon one arbitrary plan—the ungraceful form of a dry-goods box. The sides are dau...

By Mark Twain
The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so he sent for a clergyman and asked him, 'Whe...

By Mark Twain
Some authorities hold that the young ought not to lie at all. That, of course, is putting it rather stronger than necessary; still, while I ca...

By Mark Twain
Protestant parents still keep a Bible handy in the house, so that the children can study it, and one of the first things the little boys and g...

By Mark Twain
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, an...

By Mark Twain
It was awful thoughts, and awful words, but they was said. And I let them stay said, and never thought no more about reforming. I shoved the w...

By Mark Twain
I used to worship the mighty genius of Michael Angelo—that man who was great in poetry, painting, sculpture, architecture—great in every t...

By Mark Twain
I went to the circus, and loafed around the back side till the watchman went by, and then dived in under the tent. I had my twenty-dollar gold...

By Mark Twain
I have got enough of the old masters! Brown says he has 'shook' them, and I think I will shake them, too. You wander through a mile of picture...

By Mark Twain
He had had much experience of physicians, and said, 'the only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like...

By Mark Twain
He ketched a frog one day and took him home and said he cal'lated to educate him; and so he never done nothing for three months but set in his...

By Mark Twain
Geological time is not money.

By Mark Twain
Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of Humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.

By Mark Twain
Demagogue—a vessel containing beer and other liquids.

By Mark Twain